Sunday, February 27, 2011

2011 Oscars Live Blog

4:55- These comments are going to be very occasional for a while, then pick up when the red carpet picks up in an hour or two. But we've gone to Giuliana on E! which means we're getting closer to the actual red carpet show, rather than the pre-red carpet show. But WTF is Giuliana wearing?

5:00- I don't care all that much about what dresses people are wearing, but Kelly Osbourne correctly predicted what Florence of Florence + the Machine would wear at the Grammys, so it'll be interesting if she could predict something. But nobody should try to predict what Helena Bonham Carter will wear. Ever.

5:03- Sorry, Giuliana, I don't think Natalie Portman is watching right now and asking for the dress you like.

5:07- Natalie Portman will probably win tonight, so let's have a fun look back at one of my favorite moments in the career of a fellow Long Island Jew:

5:23- I think E! is going through a long history of the careers of both Anne Hathaway and James Franco to show us that they both appeared in mediocre Steve Carell comedies.

5:25- Nope, it was to make Giuliana look like a fool when she forgot James Franco's name. So worth it.

5:42- Just thought I'd try something. Of the 20 Acting nominees, when was the last time none of them were nominated?
2009- Jeff Bridges, Colin Firth and Jeremy Renner
2008- Melissa Leo and Amy Adams
2007- Javier Bardem
2006- NONE. Just for fun, let's keep going.
2005- Amy Adams and Michelle Williams
2004- Natalie Portman
2003- NONE
2002- Nicole Kidman
2001- Nicole Kidman
2000- Javier Bardem, Geoffrey Rush, and Jeff Bridges
1999- Annette Bening
1998- Geoffrey Rush
1997- Helena Bonham Carter
1996- Geoffrey Rush
1995- NONE
That's quite a stretch for tonight's nominated actors and actresses.

5:50- By the way, if there is one quote I'll remember from any 2010 movie, it will be "Release the Kraken!" and I didn't see Clash of the Titans.

6:00- The pre-preshow is over. Let the preshow begin. Seacrest in!

6:03- I could definitely see myself spending the rest of my life with Jennifer Lawrence. Let's see how many others I say that about tonight.

6:08- I genuinely would not have recognized the boy from The Kids are All Right if I had seen him walking down the street.

6:13- You'd almost think it was Giuliana doing this interview with Melissa Leo with how bad it's going. C'mon Seacrest.

6:16- Armie Hammer reveals that originally they wanted to cast twins as the Winkelvoss twins, but they couldn't find a good set, so he got both roles. This is like the 4th red carpet interview I've seen with Armie Hammer the past 8 weeks, how have we never heard this before?

6:24- It is completely absurd that Hailee Steinfeld is nominated for best supporting actress instead of best actress, but it might give her a better chance to win.

6:26- E! Red Carpet hosts have an odd obsession with the previous nights SNL (see Eisenberg at the SAGs and Brand at the Grammys). Florence minus the Machine not best dressed tonight.

6:27- Mila Kunis is #2 on the Jennifer Lawrence list of people I want to marry. Also she apparently got her role in Black Swan based on her performance in Forgetting Sarah Marshall. Awesome.

6:32- Mandy Moore, Vincent Chase's ex, looks good, as always. Put her on the list. 3.

6:34- Giuliana can't do math. Not even math, just figuring out which is the bigger number.

6:36- Michelle Williams has opened up her drastic lead in career success for Dawson's Creek alum. Your move, Van Der Beek.

6:37- ABC's people are kinda creepy. It changes to a different Red Carpet show at 7, so we'll check back in there then.

6:40- Amy Adams, of Enchanted fame and at one point a recurring guest on The Office, seems very nervous and anxious despite this being her third nomination. It might be her best chance to win.

6:43- Mark Ruffalo just arrived. He's nominated for either his role in The Kids are All Right or being the inspiration for the animated short The Gruffalo. You decide.

6:50- Okay, I thought Mandy Moore looked good, but Giuliana and Kelly are going over the top. Also she looks kinda eerily like Anne Hathaway, no?

6:54- Apparently The King's Speech was going to be a play until Geoffrey Rush got involved. So way to go, Geoffrey Rush. You just screwed Colin Firth out of a Tony.

6:56- If Jennifer Hudson had shown that much cleavage on Idol, she wouldn't be considered the most robbed contestant in the show's history.

6:57- Good news guys. Giuliana could figure out that the 81% of viewers who voted for Natalie Portman was more than the 7% for Michelle Williams.

7:00- Kelly says Cate Blanchett pushes the envelope without going too far. Looking at this dress, I'm a little afraid at what too far would be.

7:01- Apparently Marissa Tomei wants to be more like Helena Bonham Carter.

7:04- Who thought it was a good idea to give Kelly Osbourne a telestrator? ABC now has Robin Roberts and Tim Gunn. Awesome.

7:06- I'm not a Maria Menounos fan, but her interview with Hailee Steinfeld was more interesting than any interview Seacrest has had all night.

7:07- Jesse Eisenberg doesn't own a tv, but he "loves watching [Robin Roberts] in person."

7:15- Jennifer Lawrence's nickname is Jeff Bridges. I'm gunna go with it's because she's an awesome bowler.

7:17- Random question- Why is Russell Brand at the Oscars?

7:19- PS22 is performing at the Oscars? Awesome. That's fantastic.

7:25- You're never going to believe this, but Helena Bonham Carter is in black.

7:28- Random thought- Javier Bardem kinda reminds me of my Rabbi.

7:34- Gwyneth Paltrow seems legitimately nervous about performing tonight. Guess that means she's not being joined by puppets?

7:37- It's hard for ScarJo to look bad, but I'm not crazy about her today.

7:41- Why is Matthew McConaughey here? When was he last relevent?

7:50- I'm pretty sure Mark Wahlberg just insulted costar Amy Adams.

7:54- This is a whole lot of red carpetting, so I apologize if my posts slow down over the next half hour.

7:57- Since it's the single most anticipated dress of the night, I'll put my two sense in- I think Natalie Portman looks fantastic.

8:00- Apparently the final half hour is ABC's exclusive domain.

8:02- In non-Oscars fashion, Clyde Frazier may have topped himself with a powder purple suit tonight.

8:07- There's a 10% chance that Anne Hathaway will be the sole host of the Oscars by 11pm. James Franco seems high as a kite.

8:14- Gwyneth Paltrow's dress may not be my favorite, but she seems more genuinely happy than I remember ever seeing her.

8:27- Tom Hanks will be presenting the first award tonight, which is traditionally Supporting Actress. The more you know.

8:30- And we're off. Rumor is we're starting with a Billy Crystal style montague with Hathaway and Franco inserted into movies from 2010. Right now it's just a montage of the nominated best pictures.

8:32- Ah here's the Crystal style montage. Starting with Incetion, where they decide they will enter Alec Baldwin's dreams for hosting secrets. Franco starts spinning a dreidel to see if it's still a dream. Social Network. The Fighter. True Grit. Now being narrated by Morgan Freeman. The King's Speech. Back to the Future? And we're off the screen and onto the stage.

8:41- This has been a great year for lesbians in films. It was funnier when Joel McHale talked about it last night. And now, Gone with the Wind.

8:43- And that is an awful transition into introducing Tom Hanks introducing Titanic...wait what?

8:45- Our first award is for Art Direction. Alice in Wonderland, HP7, Inception, King's Speech, True Grit. And the Oscar goes to Alice in Wonderland.

8:47- Cinematography- Black Swan, Inception, King's Speech, Social Network, True Grit (aka if the best picture nominees were still just 5). And the winner is Inception.

8:51- Kirk Douglas, who I believe is in his early-90s and may well be healthier than his son, is now on stage. He says James looks much better out of a cape, while Anne is gorgeous, and asks her where she was when he was making pictures. He's absolutely a legend, but this is tough to watch. Supporting Actress. The nominees- Amy Adams (The Fighter), Helena Bonham Carter (King's Speech), Jacki Weaver (Animal Kingdom), Melissa Leo (The Fighter), and Hailee Steinfeld (True Grit). I picked Adams as my pick and Leo to win, and the Oscar goes to...wait first Douglas has to point out that Hugh Jackman is laughing. And the Oscar now goes to Melissa Leo.

9:00- Before Douglas can present her with the Oscar, he tells her that he thinks she's much pretties than she was in the movie. And we have our first bleep of the night.

9:05- Hathaway is cracking herself up now. Here to present, Mila Kunis and Justin Timberlake. JT reveals that he is Banksy, which Kunis denies. Animated Short. Day and Night, The Gruffalo, Let's Polute, The Lost Thing, Madagascar: A Journey Diary. This is the first time I've ever seen an animated short nominee, as Day and Night was shown before TS3 in theaters. But the winner is The Lost Thing.

9:08- Now for animated feature. The nominees How to Train Your Dragon, The Illusionist, Toy Story 3. I picked TS3 as my pick and to win. And the Oscar goes to Toy Story 3. A very sweet end to a series, winning an award that was not around for the first two films.

9:13- It appears we already have gotten rid of James Franco, as Anne Hathaway reminisces about the 1st Oscars. And now, Josh Brolin and Javier Bardem, in matching white dinner jackets. Adapted Screenplay. 127 Hours, Social Network, TS3, True Grit, Winter's Bone. I picked Sorkin (Social Network) as my pick and to win, and the Oscar goes to Aaron Sorkin. May the West Wing rejoice.

9:16- Okay Sorkin goes as long as you would expect Sorkin to go. But thanking Armie Hammer twice is funny. Original Screenplay- Another Year, The Fighter, Inception, The Kids are Alright, The King's Speech. I picked Seidler (King's Speech) as my pick and to win, and the Oscar goes to David Seidler. I don't want to rub it in, but I'm 4/4 tonight.

9:20- Seidler is quite amusing and charming, isn't he? Quite a nice speech.

9:23- Hathway was going to do a duet. But whoever she was going to sing with quit on her. So she's singing Les Mis' On My Own, about Hugh Jackman, who had brought her on stage to sing with him when he hosted 2 years ago. And here's James Franco in drag, with our first Charlie Sheen joke. And here are Russell Brand and Helen Mirren. I hope to present The King's Speech. No, it's for Foreign Language Film. Biutiful, Dogtooth, In a Better World, Incendies, and Outside the Law. And the Oscar goes to In a Better World.

9:31- Academy Award Winning Actress Reese Witherspoon here to present supporting actor. Christian Bale (The Fighter), John Hawks (Winter's Bone), Jeremy Renner (The Town), Mark Ruffalo (The Kids are All Right), and Geoffrey Rush (King's Speech). I picked Rush as my pick and Bale to win, and the Oscar goes to Christian Bale. It was a truly terrific performance. On to The Dark Knight Rises. Bale doesn't drop the F-bomb like Leo because he's done that before, citing his on-set rant from a few years back.

9:40- Everyone's favorite part of the ceremony, the president of the academy, and someone from ABC/Disney. Brief.

9:42- Aussies Hugh Jackman and Nicole Kidman on stage to present a history of sound with film. And now the orchestra will play some of your favorite film themes. Nominees for original score- How to Train Your Dragon, The King's Speech, Social Network, 127 Hours, Inception. The Oscar goes to The Social Network.

9:48- ScarJo and Matt McConaughey presenting sound mixing, or just saying sound over and over. The nominees- Inception, King's Speech, Salt, Social Network, and True Grit. And the Oscar goes to Inception.

9:50- ScarJo and MattMac (idk) for sound editing- Inception, TS3, TRON: Legacy, True Grit, and Unstoppable. And the Oscar goes to Inception.

9:55- Our next presenter is Marissa Tomei, the person everyone always forgets won an Oscar (for My Cousin Vinnie). She's telling us about the Scientific and Technology Awards. I'm going to let you read up on the winners of this if you so desire.

9:57- Now presenting, Oscar Winning Actress Cate Blanchett, for makeup. Nominees- Barney's Version, The Way Back, and The Wolfman. And the winner is The Wolfman. I bet if you saw that in theaters, you left saying "now that was an Academy Award winning film."

10:00- Blanchett will stick with us and present best costumes. The nominees are Alice in Wonderland, I Am Love, The King's Speech, The Tempest, and True Grit. And the Oscar goes to  Alice in Wonderland.

10:01- A look back at some of the classic Best Original Songs, including Obama's favorite "As Time Goes By," "Beauty and the Beast," and "It's Hard Out Here for a Pimp." And Kevin Spacey is presenting our nominees. First, Randy Newman and his song from TS3.

10:04- From Tangled, Mandy Moore and Zachary Levi. And a commercial break before the next two. 

10:15- Here are Amy Adams and Jake Gyllenhaal. Gyllenhaal refers to short films as the hardest part to pick on your Oscar prediction pool. We're doing documentary shorts, and the Oscar goes to Strangers No More.

10:17- And now live action short, and the Oscar goes to God of Love.

10:18- Franco informs us this is the year of the movie musical, showing us auto-tuned scenes from random films. Quite amusing.

10:20- And here's our next presenter, an up-and-coming television personality named Oprah Winfrey, presenting outstanding documentary. The nominees are Exit Through the Gift Shop, GasLand, Inside Job, Restrepo, and Waste Land. And the Oscar goes to Inside Job. Damn, now we'll never know who Banksy is.

10:26- And here is legendary Oscar host Billy Crystal. Not holding an envelope, so this could be time waster. Talking about Bob Hope.

10:32- We now have Jude Law and Robert Downey Jr, with the nominees for visual effects. Alice in Wonderland, HP7, Hereafter, Inception, Iron Man 2. And the Oscar goes to Inception. They certainly are winning a lot tonight.

10:35- Sorry, I missed the nominees for film editing, due to the Knicks game, but the Oscar goes to The Social Network.

10:41- Well at least James Franco is cracking Anne Hathaway up. Academy Award Winner, and American Idol 7th Place Finisher (that might be wrong) Jennifer Hudson introducing the last two nominated songs. Florence of Florence + the Machine filling in for Dido in a song from 127 Hours.


10:45- And Gwyneth Paltrow concludes our musical portion of the show with a nominated song from Country Strong. Her Grammy performance was more entertaining.

10:47- And Hudson presents the Original Song Oscar to We Belong Together by Randy Newman from Toy Story 3. He's been nominated a lot. But he's only won twice now. An amusing speech.

10:48- The In Memoriam tribute is coming up. Who do you have as the hammer? I'm taking Dennis Hopper.

10:51- That Modern Family promo was funnier than any episode this season.

10:55- And here's Celine Dion singing the classic "Smile" as we look back at those we lost this year, ending with Lena Horne, who I knew was going to be the hammer and then bet against it. And now Halle Berry does a tribute for Horne.

11:02- There are only four awards left, and they're the big four. Here's Hillary Swank to welcome Catherine Bigelow to present best direct. Darren Aronofsky, David O. Russell, Tom Hooper, David Fincher, Coen Bros. I have Fincher as my pick and to win, but the Oscar goes to Tom Hooper for The King's Speech. That's an upset, and it should mean there is no question that The King's Speech will win best picture.

11:07- Here's Annette Bening, talking about lifetime achievement award winners.

11:12- And here's the defending Best Actor, Jeff Bridges, presenting Best Actress. Bridges is talking to them each personally. Annette Bening (The Kids are All Right), Nicole Kidman (Rabbit Hole), Jennifer Lawrence (Winter's Bone), Natalie Portman (Black Swan), and Michelle Williams (Blue Valentine). I picked Portman as my choice and to win, and the Oscar goes to Natalie Portman. Hooray Long Island Jews!

11:25- Anne Hathaway gives a shoutout to Oscar drinking games! And here's last year's Best Actress, Sandra Bullock, presenting Best Actor. Geez has her life changed since she won. Javier Bardem (Biutiful), Jeff Bridges (True Grit), Jesse Eisenberg (The Social Network), Colin Firth (The King's Speech, and James Franco (127 Hours). Does Franco go like Hugh Jackman at the Tony's and host and win (The Boy from Oz) or NPH at the Emmy's and host and lose (HIMYM)? I have Firth as my choice and to win, and the Oscar goes to Colin Firth.

11:36- And now, Best Picture, presented by Hollywood Legend, Steven Speilberg. The nominees: 127 Hours, Black Swan, The Fighter, Inception, The Kids are All Right, The King's Speech, The Social Network, Toy Story 3, True Grit, and Winter's Bone. This was an awesome way to introduce the nominees, but it's obviously King's Speech-centric. My favorite was The King's Speech, and it is my pick to win. And the 2011 Academy Award for Best Picture goes to The King's Speech.

11:40- But we're not done yet, here's a closing song from the famous PS22 chorus, with "Somewhere Over the Rainbow," joined on stage by all of tonight's winners. It is at this point where I must remind you that The Wizard of Oz lost in the Best Picture category, although it is hard to argue with Gone with the Wind. Thanks for following the live blog. Have a good night.

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