Right here, I'll be live blogging the SAG Awards, from the Red Carpet (at 6 on E!) to the actual award show (at 8 on both TBS and TNT, don't ask me why). And during breaks, I'll be flipping to the end of the NHL All Star Game (currently in the 2nd period on Versus) and the NFL Pro Bowl (at 7 on Fox). And I may just stop by the Knicks game too. So settle in, get your refresh button ready, and comment along as we celebrate the award show that has the best opening despite not having a host...
5:40- I'm not a huge NHL fan (most likely because my team, the Islanders, are just historically awful), but this all star weekend has been phenominal. They did a fantasy draft for the teams, which is possibly the most ingenious idea ever. Hopefully the NBA will follow suit.
5:49- Team Lidstrom has their first lead of the game! Granted, 7-6 is not a real hockey score, but wouldn't it be exciting if this went to a shootout? Still a long time to go...
6:00- Oh my god, Carrie is smoking aga- wait I don't care about this Sex and the City rerun. Come on E!, I'm ready for 2 hours of Red Carpet Coverage of an award show most people don't realize exist. And here we go. Guliana Rancic and... Ross the Intern? Where's Seacrest?
6:03- Giuliana and Ross are gunna be rough to listen to, so it may not be too much red carpet blogging from me. The British fashion girl, on the other hand, I very much enjoy.
6:09- Scott Bakula should prewrite his toasts
6:11- Yes! Let's make the 15-year-old Oscar nominee feel awkward and uncomfortable!
6:13- Either Chord Overstreet is much shorter than I thought, or Giuliana is wearing 2 foot heels.
6:15- What happens when you have 2 gay guys comparing pocket squares on national tv? Ross and Jesse Tyler Ferguson are letting us find out.
6:18- It looks like, if form holds, we will pass the 1,000 hit mark tonight, so preemptively- thank you!
6:20- Jesse Eisenberg, just as awkward as he was hosting SNL last night. Giuliana clearly didn't see it. Also he's pretty much a jackass.
6:22- Oh wow, last night was actually the first time Eisenberg and Zuckerberg met. I figured that was just a joke. Okay, I give Eisenberg a little more credit now, cuz that must have been nerveracking.
6:28- Sarah Hyland is unfairly attractive. It's sometimes easy to forget that, because they have to make her look much younger on Modern Family, but she is very, very attractive. Typically, Diana Agron is too, but she seems to have used Michelle Bachmann's makeup artist tonight.
6:30- Wow a penalty shot! Lundquist denies him! 7-7 with about 13 minutes left! Shoot out! Shoot out!
6:32- I missed the beginning of the interview, but I did not recognize Army Hammer (Social Network) at all. And Giuliana is obsessed with the Jesse Eisenberg/Mark Zuckerberg meeting. And Jane Krakowski looks very pregnant, as I now remember why we saw a bump in Jenna storylines recently. Probably a downward trend for the rest of the season.
6:38- With 10 minutes left, Team Lidstrom tied it back up at 8-8. I'm feeling the shoot out!
6:39- But now Team Lidstrom jumps ahead! 9-8! Geez!
6:40- They seem obsessed with showing Angie Harmon, who if my calculations are correct, was last relevent in 2001. But she's a presenter! Jenna Ushkowski (Glee) apparaently has tattoos. She looks much better tonight than she did at the Globes.
6:45- Our fashion expert was expecting a lot of red and orange, and good news- Mila Kunis is wearing red! Jennifer Lawrence, who was nominated for something, is now being interviewed. She's 20 and pretty much drop dead gorgeous. Don't know anything else about her though. Winter's Bone, that's the film.
6:47- Okay, Agron's makeup doesn't look quite as bad in the interview. Still, looks very different than she looks on Glee, not sure what it is.
6:50- Oh boy, Tracy Morgan. Last time he was interviewed, during the Knicks-Heat game on TNT, it didn't go so well. He's thanking his kidney-donating ex-girlfriend. And "Sarah Palin, you're the hottest MILF in the world!" So clearly he's not apologizing for that interview.
6:52- As Giuliana asks Ed Helms to make a sex tape for her, we see Mad Men guest star (former guest star?) Cara Buono, who looks much better in 00s fashion than 60s fashion. And Modern Family's Julie Bowen apparently watches Giuliana and Bill's reality show, and tells her not to have kids.
6:53- An empty net goal for Team Lidstrom makes it 11-9, but with over a minute to go, this isn't over.
6:56- And Staal scores with 33.6 sec to go, making it 11-10. They got the shots off, but couldn't make it. And that's your game.
6:58- Naya Rivera and Chord Overstreet definitely want you to know that they are not dating. Not. Absolutely not.
7:00- Mila Kunis looks the same age as Sarah Hyland. For the record, she's 7 years older. But either way, she was born 4 years after the 70s ended, and was still in That 70s Show.
7:01- At some point, Sofia Vergara having enormous breasts is going to get old. But we're not there yet.
7:03- Giuliana Rancic is an expert at making celebrities feel awkward. She's succeeded in every single interview tonight. Like asking Vergara "when did you realize your boyfriend was a keeper?" and "what body part would you most like to change?"
7:05- Of course Jeff Probst officiated Jenna Fischer's wedding. That makes sense. I assume Boston Rob had to be best man.
7:07- Fischer gives some possible spoilers re:Carell leaving. John Krasinski counters by criticizing Giuliane, legitimately.
7:09- SI's Joe Posnanski just referred to the Pro Bowl as "One more chance to see the Fox Football Robot dance." That's about how much attention I'll be paying to it. Meanwhile Jane Lynch proposed a Glee threesome with her, Javier Bardem, and Penelope Cruz. Yeah, that made even Giuliana feel uncomfortable.
7:12- Nothing like an all star game that gets the label of "nearly sold out." Oh Pro Bowl...
7:14- January Jones much more conservative tonight than at the Globes, but still looks pretty good. She also wants to do a comedy guest gig to soften her image, but can't because people are afraid of her because of her character on Mad Men.
7:16- And here's Claire Danes. I'll save you the suspense- she'll win best actress in a miniseries/made-for-tv movie for her role as Temple Grandin. I hope she's here tonight, but it doesn't sound like it. Lea Michele looks very good tonight.
7:17- Heather Morris is still the hottest person I've ever seen. Just saying.
7:23- Pro Bowl jerseys are pretty hideous this year. Just saying.
7:25- Natalie Portman pulls off pregnant very well. But, in a worrisome development, Giuliana is suggesting terrible baby names. WE NEED SEACREST!
7:27- Jon Hamm looks pretty much like Jon Hamm always looks. He promises to text Ross as soon as he knows when Mad Men comes back.
7:30- Giuliana stated she was dying because of Nicole Kidman's dress, but she kept on going with the interview. She and Keith Urban apparently just adopted, so that's nice.
7:32- Now we have Batman himself, Christian Bale, who I always forget is British. It's his birthday. I bet he wins an award as a birthday gift. Or because people liked him a lot in The Fighter.
7:35- Amy Adams looks very good, but that doesn't stop Giuliana from asking her if she's more like "a street-tough broad or a Disney princess?" You know, cuz she's played both.
7:38- Julia Styles looks really, really good. James Franco is going off about how he doesn't tweet. And halfway through the 1st quarter, we have a scoreless Pro Bowl.
7:42- JT is apparently a married woman. He's also cool with being referred to as JT, which is good because I wasn't typing out Justin Timberlake, except for just now when I did. "This is definitely the best red carpet interview ever." But Giuliana is countering with a look back of their previous interviews. Also JT turns 30 tomorrow. Wow.
7:45- Christina Hendricks is in a bit more of a modern look than she normally wears, even off set. She still looks very good, yet Giuliana seems more interested in talking to her husband. I don't know why.
7:47- Are there actually rumors that Hendricks will be the new Wonder Woman? Because that's going to be a tv show, and I feel like she's already on a pretty good one...
7:49- We get our first look of Helena Bonham Carter, who Ross calls "an art piece." The hair is odd, but the dress is...well it's odd, but not as odd as the Globes dress. Also Tina Fey went bright red. That seems not like her.
7:50- Hey look, the NFC scored, it's 7-0. And Philip Rivers just threw a pick, this could be a blowout. The suspense, however, is really whether or not I'll remember to check in again.
7:52- Our first check-in of the Knicks, who are up 19-12, with a hot Gallo and Mozgov playing!
7:54- Kim Kardashian is here with her brother. I don't know why.
7:55- Mark Wahlberg forgot to shave. I don't care, but it's pretty noticable in HD.
7:59- This should close out our Red Carpet coverage, so let's flip the channel and head to the actual award show. Who gets to announce that they are an actor?
8:01- Actually we're pretty much kicking this off by recapping the red carpet. Remember all those people we looked at over the past 2 hours? Guess what, they're all still there, plus many more!
8:03- Our intros tonight- Jack McBrayer! Cracking up Chris Parnell. Julianna Margulies! Rico Rodriguez! Melissa Leo! Julia Stiles! And our first presenters- Betty White and Alec Baldwin! The year of Betty White literally will never end.
8:05- White- "Aren't we lucky to both still be working at our age." Outstanding actor in a drama. I picked Hamm as my pick and Cranston as the likely winner, and the winner is Steve Buscemi! 0/1
8:08- Actors apparently don't play actors off. This could be a while. Annette Benning and Mark Ruffalo of The Kids are Alright are next. They're summarizing the film. No idea why Julianne Moore isn't involved.
8:12- I just want to mention in Oscar predictions, I accurately guessed 10 of 10 best picture nominees. Legendary film critic Roger Ebert only went 9 of 10. Next is Cory Monteith and Eva Longoria for tv dramatic actress. I picked Margulies as my pick and as the likely winner, and the winner is Margulies. 1/2
8:16- How often do we get to the thank the in-laws part of the speech?
8:17- BTW the Pro Bowl is a 21-0 NFC blowout, while the Knicks are tied at 36, so breaks will be exclusively Knicks it seems.
8:22- We now go to the uberattractive presenting duo of Taye Diggs and Sofia Vergara. Outstanding Ensemble in a Drama. I picked Mad Men as my pick and Boardwalk Empire as the likely winner, and the winner is Boardwalk Empire. 2/3
8:28- Dennis Haysbert is introducing an advertisement acting montage.
8:30- That was a lot of excellent free advertising for a lot of companies. Here's Jason Bateman. January Jones doesn't seem impressed. Female Actor in Supporting Role for Film- I picked Carter as my pick and Steinfeld as the likely winner, and the winner is Melissa Leo. 2/4
8:35- And Leo gets political with a pro-union stance as we enter our second break.
8:40- It's now 42-0 NFC. That was fun. Here's Amy Poehler. Guess what? She's funny. Male actor in a comedy series. I picked Burrell as my pick and Carell as the likely winner, and the winner is Alec Baldwin. 2/5
8:43- At this point Baldwin just mocks the previous acceptance speeches. Here's Jon Hamm, presenting actress in a comedy series. I picked Lynch as my pick and as the likely winner, and the winner is Betty White. Yup. That happened. 2/6
8:48- One has to wonder if this award show is really more serious than the Golden Globes. I mean, I get Betty White is in, and she was great in that Sandra Bullock/Ryan Reynolds movie and on SNL, but for Hot in Cleveland? Really. Now HBC, Geoffrey Rush, and Colin Firth introduce my favorite movie of the year, The King's Speech.
8:50- Here are Angie Harmon and LL Cool J with our best ensemble for a comedy series. I picked 30 Rock as my pick and Modern Family as the likely winner, and the winner is Modern Family. 3/7
8:54- Ed O'Neill seems genuinely touched to be accepting this award. So good for them.
8:58- Just a thought- maybe no actor watched Hot in Cleveland after the first episode, assumed it must have gotten better for TVLand to pick it up for 2 more seasons, and assumed Betty White was the reason, and voted for her. Or they like her cuz she's old or something.
9:00- I'd rather tweet the SAGs with Jason Sehorn than Angie Harmon. Here are Natalie Portman and Mila Kunis presenting Black Swan.
9:01- Tim Conway is introducing Ernest Borgnine, tonight's Life Achievement award winner, the first SAG Life Achievement award winner to be a guest on SNL's What Up With That
9:06- We're on an Ernest Borgnine montage right now, and then I bet he speaks. Meanwhile the Knicks trail by 5 in the 3rd and the NFC leads 42-7 at the half.
9:11- First, Red costar Morgan Freeman (and Borgnine's coguest on WUWT) is going to speak. And now here's Ernie.
9:14- Time for the In Memoriam segment. My hammer pick- Dennis Hopper.
9:17- The Knicks have knotted it up at 77 in the 3rd!
9:20- First we have male actor in a tv movie/miniseries. I didn't pick, but I bet it will be Al Pacino. And it is. But he couldn't be there. Congrats Jeremy Renner, you just got an award. Now, the 4 men of The Social Network present their film.
9:23- Here are Rosario Dawson and Mr. Fergie presumably presenting actress in a tv movie/miniseries. And they are. Again, this will be Claire Danes as Temple Grandin in Temple Grandin. Hey guess what guys? It's Claire Danes!
9:27- Hillary Swank introduces our in memoriam tribute. We open wityh Jill Clayburgh. And we close with Dennis Hopper. RIP.
9:37- Susan Sarandon just lost, but now she gets to present male actor in a supporting role. I picked Rush as my pick and Bale to win, and the winner is Bale. 4/8
9:40- Bale brings up the guy he played in The Fighter. Then he talks about how these speeches often get long and boring, before delivering a long and boring speech.
9:41- And here are Bale's costars, Mark Wahlberg and Amy Adams, to introduce The Fighter. Wahlberg also gives a shoutout to Boardwalk Empire, which I believe he produces.
9:43- Here is your defending Male Actor, Jeff Bridges, presenting the Female equivilent. I picked Portman as my pick and to win, and the winner is Portman. Shocker.
9:47- The AFC has come back a bit, while the Knicks are up.
9:52- We're gunna go in speed mode now, cuz we're running out of time. Nicole Kidman presents Best Actor. I have Firth as my pick and to win, and the winner is Firth. Just a stunner.
9:57- And we're at best cast of a film. The Fighter. Black Swan. The King's Speech. The Kids are Alright. The Social Network. I picked The King's Speech, with The Social Network to win. Presenting is Donald Sutherland. And our winner is The King's Speech. Hooray!
10:00- Rush speaks, because "at one point the film was going to be called The King's Speech Therapist." Happy for the film, makes the Oscars a very interesting match between The King's Speech (DGA and SAG winner) and The Social Network (GG winner). And that does it for the show! And the Knicks win 124-106! But there are 9 minutes left in the Pro Bowl, so let's keep this up!
10:01- I'm kidding. I can't live-tweet the Pro Bowl. It just isn't that interesting. Have a good night, and thanks for reading!